Xtina. Who Will You Gutter Tape Your Gob?

[drbastard]

I’m confessing my malaise right here, right now, for the so-called pop queen Christina Aguilera or Xtina, which makes her sound so much more interesting. Right?

Wrong.

Every time I open up a newspaper, gossip magazine or some music reviews she is always bitching about Britney Spears. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not a Britney obsessive (I always preferred Billie) but even I can’t deny the genius of Toxic, which totally obliterates anything Christina, oooops, Xtina has ever done. It isn’t enough for the trashy peroxide Myra Hindly of pop to slag off Britney’s wedding ring, now she’s attacking her while the poor girl is pregnant. This week I read “She’s really let herself go. I don’t see her ever making a comeback.”

What a bitch. Christina (sorry Xtina) is so jealous it’s totally shocking. At the MTV Awards when Britney kissed Madonna, so did Christina (sorry Xtina) yet who has the sheer cheek to go on the offensive a few days later? The trashy girl with the voice that sounds like a cat being strangled by it’s own vocal chords.

Bitch!

[diamond doggie bag]

Christina looked like a Oompa Loompa at the MTV Awards. She should be grateful nobody noticed she was there.

She can't dance either.

[Adem]

you mean she's still around?

[Mr. Sponge]

I saw Christina on the stripped tour a couple of years ago and she was amazing. I find it funny how Dr. Barstard can call anyone a bitch after saying that he hoped Geri would die a while back. I doubt the thread you made about 'Xtina' is going to damage her career, it's Dr. Bastard, what's the worst that can happen (like what I did there). But I personally find the constant cat fighting-ness quite amusing. Don't forget that papers always exagerrate things and lie, and for fucks sake you should not be taking what you read in a gossip magazine seriously. Hence the words 'gossip' and 'magazine'. And I can only imagine the Sun printing something as highly interesting as "Christina says Britney's face is slightly more caked in shit than it was yesterday". And why do you think Britney needs sympathy because she's pregnant? I don't think Britney is ready for a child, she'll probably end up eating it or trading it for a bird bath or something. How did that girl ever get a record deal?

Also: Please tell me the singers you actually like Dr Bastard!

[Snuff]

drbastard said:

Christina (sorry Xtina) is so jealous it’s totally shocking. At the MTV Awards when Britney kissed Madonna, so did Christina (sorry Xtina) yet who has the sheer cheek to go on the offensive a few days later?

Bitch!

That, hilariously, was because Britney and Madonna's got the most coverage in the tabloids and Christina was all like *desperate tone in her voice* "But I kissed Madonna as well! Why does Britney get all coverage? Is it because of my crap jet black curly bombshell hair?"

[Mike]

drbastard said:

This week I read “She’s really let herself go. I don’t see her ever making a comeback.”

Oh my good Lord.

That was in the Green Room of Metro, which is transparently made up. No-one with a braincell to call their own takes it seriously. I love reading it because it is such complete, utter rubbish - none of the quotes attributed to various celebs ring remotely true, and the 'exclusive stories' invariably come to nothing. I never imagined for a second that anyone would be daft enough to take it seriously....until now.

Dr Bastard: Overestimate Him At Your Peril.

Word.

[97williamsb]

The papers print complete twaddle. They always say Christina is slaggin off Britney as they want to keep the rival thing alive. They are completely different musically now and at different stages of maturity too. And Christina said about the Kissing Madonna thing was sad cause after Britney kissed Madonna MTV switched to show JT's reaction...which was more pathetic.

[Ronald Parisi]

diamonddog said:

Christina looked like a Oompa Loompa at the MTV Awards. She should be grateful nobody noticed she was there.

She can't dance either.

Oompa Loompa? Damn, you don't have to be so nice about it. And she's done worse. Did anyone see the 2004 VMA outfit which consisted of her killing 4 tie-dyed Big Birds and stringing them together?

In my book christina has two songs. Beautiful and Fighter. The others... pure shit.
I think her biggest problem is she picks fights with EVERY artist ever. Including her old Gal-Pal Pink (who did a very poetic deed by writing 'Hookers' for Christina) Damned Twat. Someone better should have replaced her loud-mouth "Look at me, I have an afro and I can sing like a mule" solo in Lady Marmalade. Pink could have done it justly. Maybe then Britney would have had Pink's original solo.


Goddamned Butterfly effect, I wish you worked now.

[Dudie]

Oh Dr B, much as I hate to spoil our lovely relationship, you do talk bollocks at times. I would have thought you would be the first to admit that these gossip columnists or whatever talk complete shite for 99% of the time which has to cast doubt on all of this stuff that Christina has supposed to have said about Britney. I hate the comparisons between the two. I love them both but my inclination is more to Christina mainly due to her versatility which is so amaz;ing. I also think she's got a fab voice.

As regards to her appearance, you are the one who thinks Gwen looks dowdy in her Cool video. Say no more.

And whoever said that Christina can't dance..you can't have seen the Dirty video obviously.

[drbeat]

Christina woops Britneys ass everytime. I dont think Christina is at all jealous of Britney...I mean for fucks sake have you seen Britney these days.
Christina has a damn sight more than Britney...a vocal talent for one, Britney is practically selling her soul to the media in order to get publicity, You can say Christina dresses badly which I will agree with but I think Britneys hardly free from error, she is just as bad as Christina if not worse.
Christina stamps on Britney, the sooner Britney and her absence of fashion sense, vocal talent and lack of brains dissapears the better!!!
Christina is on the up, its Britney who will dissapear, I mean come on she must be really desperate to have a "reality show" coming out

[puffpower]

I like Christina.

Christina dresses like a slut out of choice, and atleast there's an honesty to that, whereas Britney lies about being a virgin. Boo her. Anyone who critises Christina's dress sense should take a look at Britters in one of her darling track suits.

[Mike]

puffpower said:

I like Christina.

Christina dresses like a slut out of choice, and atleast there's an honesty to that, whereas Britney lies about being a virgin.

I'd be really impressed if she was still claiming to be one now...

The whole Britney vs Christina thing is really tired, and the media insist on dragging it out to about 40 times its natural life-span. Witness the twat who writes The Green Room coming up with this random quote. When did she allegedly say this? Having nothing to promote (her album is not now expected until early next year) has she even conducted any interviews recently?

[veryjammy]

I agree, let the Britney/Christina thing die, and I say that as a huge Britney fan. It's just not relevant anymore. Both are massive stars, both have released excellent and crap songs. In terms of press Britney undoubtedly gets more attention, as has been mentioned compare the attention given to the Xtina/Madge kiss compared to the Britney kiss, but please this is the most tedious rivalry in pop

[Mr. Sponge]

veryjammy said:

this is the most tedious rivalry in pop

50 Cunt & The Game. I thought it was hilarious how they made up in public, on a stage, with 2 microphones at the other end of the stage, with people pretending to care. They think they've got the world at their feet, and that we take great interest in hearing about The Game stealing 'fiddy's' barbie doll or favourite ice cream bowl.

Christina gets it lucky. Whenever people talk about her and Britney isn't involved, it's almost always related to her career. She rakes in the cash and has millions of dedicated fans that buy her CDs, but she's not slated by the press (that much).

I think the Lindsay Lohan and Hilary Duff thing is what people really care about now.

[sophiefrombloke]

Missy should be the one hating on all these bitches; she was there at the 2003 VMAs, too. All she got from it is her mumma cussin' at her 'Thank gawd you didn't kiss no girl', and not nearly as much publicity as Christina's 'But I got no publicity and Britney did', let alone Britney and Madonna's publicity.

[diamond doggie bag]

dudie said:

And whoever said that Christina can't dance..you can't have seen the Dirty video obviously.

Huh, is that mess supposed to prove she can dance?

[drbastard]

thisisnotatest said:

drbastard said:

This week I read “She’s really let herself go. I don’t see her ever making a comeback.”

Oh my good Lord.

That was in the Green Room of Metro, which is transparently made up. No-one with a braincell to call their own takes it seriously..

Don't be stupid Test. Xtina blatantly bitches about Britney constantly from her wedding ring to her actual wedding so what's to stop her bitching about how she looks? You are incredibly obtuse and that's why I'm more intelligent than you. Also, you have to stop overreacting and posting in haste and actually read what people are writing. I read that comment on Teletext. I don't read the Metro and I never have, actually I find it amusing that you read it but then you are very dense.

My point is simple - Xtina is frenzied with envy over her better rival.

Let me also point out that Channel Four is showing Britney's Redneck Roots tonight. Redneck rubbish more like.





The Metro. Oh God.

[drbastard]

dudie said:

Oh Dr B, much as I hate to spoil our lovely relationship, you do talk bollocks at times. I would have thought you would be the first to admit that these gossip columnists or whatever talk complete shite for 99% of the time which has to cast doubt on all of this stuff that Christina has supposed to have said about Britney.

What? Everyone comments on gossip columns! The Popjustice forums are, by their very definition, a place to gossip about pop music and this forum, idiot, is where you bitch and gossip about singers you hate.

Word.

dudie said:

As regards to her appearance, you are the one who thinks Gwen looks dowdy in her Cool video. Say no more.

Don't you understand anything?

[drbastard]

diamonddog said:

Christina looked like a Oompa Loompa at the MTV Awards.

Christina has made her reputation as the more wild of the two, deny it if you want but it's true. Yet how can Xtina compete with someone who marries and divorces on the same night, attempts to slash her wrists in a pop video and snogs Madonna? Plus Toxic is the best so there!

Christina is just a dog with a banshee voice.

[Dudie]

[

dudie said:

As regards to her appearance, you are the one who thinks Gwen looks dowdy in her Cool video. Say no more.

Don't you understand anything?

[/quote]

Obviously not, but then I'm just an idiot so can't help myself.

[drbastard]

I also don't understand the whole connection between Christina's confusing quasi political feminism and dressing like a tramp. I suppose when she dresses Dirrty she empowers women who feel closeted by their banal lifestyles or something.

I'm probably too stupid to understand because I'm not in the industry or because I'm middle class and white.

[mwah]

Apparently, Britney mimed her 'Like A Virgin' piece whereas Xtina sang live. I'm not saying this is true but if so, I can understand why Xtina would be pissed off with Britney grabbing all the attention.

I don't understand Britney's appeal at all. Personally I find her slightly desperate but completely lazy. The miming of her tour was, in my opinion, a farce. She's not established enough to get away with such antics.

[drbeat]

I dont think she mimed Like a Virgin cos her bit was shite!!!, she sounds like a sheep. I just watched
Out All Night with Britney Spears on MTV and my god she is so fucking thick!!! she talks like she is 10 years old.

[puffpower]

drbeat said:

I just watched
Out All Night with Britney Spears on MTV and my god she is so fucking thick!!! she talks like she is 10 years old.

By all accounts, intellectually and emotionally, she is.

[sophiefrombloke]

drbastard said:

I also don't understand the whole connection between Christina's confusing quasi political feminism and dressing like a tramp. I suppose when she dresses Dirrty she empowers women who feel closeted by their banal lifestyles or something.

I'm probably too stupid to understand because I'm not in the industry or because I'm middle class and white.

I think Xtina's feminism is lost on many women, like Sam from Big Brother. Women shouldn't have to dress a certain way to please men, but maybe, by dressing the way she does, Christina, instead of saying 'Look at me! Does this make you want to sleep with me? Oh please do, because my life is empty without a penis inside of every orifice I have. I was born to make you happy etc.', she's actually saying 'Look at me! I'm hot, aren't I? You want me, and even if you're a gayer and you don't want me, you wish your body was half as attractive and appealing as mine. Look how much control I have over you and your weak, one-tracked mind! You have to sit down? Oh...'

Maybe Christina is a woman who actually realises how attractive she is, without any insecurities about any part of her body, and she feels confident enough to show people her body. However, I don't think such a woman exists.

In reference to Christina versus Britney, I envy Christina but I'm only jealous of Britney. Christina's got talent that isn't seen as much as people with talent at par with Britney's. However, Christina should be a bit more modest. Being engaged to Jordan Bratman should be proof enough of Christina's willingness to be modest.

[Pensiero Bello]

Dr Bastard, lots of people read the Metro on their way to work. I don't really think it makes you dense!

[Josh]

thisemptybrain said:

diamonddog said:

Christina looked like a Oompa Loompa at the MTV Awards. She should be grateful nobody noticed she was there.

She can't dance either.

Oompa Loompa? Damn, you don't have to be so nice about it. And she's done worse. Did anyone see the 2004 VMA outfit which consisted of her killing 4 tie-dyed Big Birds and stringing them together?

In my book christina has two songs. Beautiful and Fighter. The others... pure shit.
I think her biggest problem is she picks fights with EVERY artist ever. Including her old Gal-Pal Pink (who did a very poetic deed by writing 'Hookers' for Christina) Damned Twat. Someone better should have replaced her loud-mouth "Look at me, I have an afro and I can sing like a mule" solo in Lady Marmalade. Pink could have done it justly. Maybe then Britney would have had Pink's original solo.


Goddamned Butterfly effect, I wish you worked now.

"Hooker" has always remained anonymous as to who it is about. People speculate it is Xtina, others Tim Armstrong's ex-wife (he co-wrote the song) and some even reckon Linda Perry (having played a huge part in reviving her career from the dead it wouldn't be surprising considering how much work she gets these days).

And yes, I agree Pink could have done Xtina's bit on Lady Marmalade. Pink was underused on the song in my opinion.

As for Xtina, she has picked too many fights. And she seems to be taking forever to follow up Stripped.

[Josh]

mwah said:

Apparently, Britney mimed her 'Like A Virgin' piece whereas Xtina sang live. I'm not saying this is true but if so, I can understand why Xtina would be pissed off with Britney grabbing all the attention.

I read that too, but were Britney's vocals for "Hollywood" live too? I know Xtina and Britney vocals on that were minimal, but there were some.

As for miming "Like A Virgin", I don't get why Britney would have or why it would be a big deal if she had. It isn't the most difficult song to sing in the world is it?

[AugustMoon]

drbastard said:

I also don't understand the whole connection between Christina's confusing quasi political feminism and dressing like a tramp. I suppose when she dresses Dirrty she empowers women who feel closeted by their banal lifestyles or something.

Aguilera explained, at the time of Dirrty, that she dressed like that because she's an artist. It needn't be more complicated than that - attention grabbing clothes can be tools of the trade.

However, if you want to make a bigger deal of it, it's quite possible to do so. One way to do it is to take Aguilera to be an archetypal postfeminist - like a continuation of Madonna, who obviously is even more archetypal:


So the "post-" in postfeminism would denote that the purely feminist struggle is over to some extent. It's maybe a bit spoilt to complain about your circumstances, if you're a western woman of today, being a million times richer, and with a thousand times more and better opportunities, than women of earlier times, and in other parts of the world. And being relatively strong vis-à-vis the male part of the population. However, it needn't be taken that literary, I guess. It could be like the concept of post-modernism, which still entails a whole lot of modernism. So postfeminism would be just a distinctly new phase of feminism. Maybe a stage where becoming "honorary males" isn't seen as such an ideal for the feminists anymore? And were a sensible kind of female chauvinism can be more openly acknowledged? That could be a natural development, couldn't it?

As for Aguilera; it was striking how the quality of her music went up while the healthiness of her looks went down, to equal degrees, in 2002. It makes me feel that she's a modern-day Billie Holiday or Janis Joplin, where the brilliance of their music and their "hard living" are inextricably linked. It's something I feel a bit uneasy about it anyway. Her having a dubious dress sense is nothing compared with how dead her eyes can look, and how unhealthy the colour of her skin can be. A high price to pay to get away from the "Genie in a Bottle" persona.

And yes, the main point - for me her dressing like a tramp is more a desperate effort to keep up with Britney's success than a proper feminist stance. I still prefer her records to Britney's though.

[Jen]

This quote didn't come from The Metro- it came from an american interview and has been repeated in every gossip column in England.
Everything in Dr B's first post I totally agree with (apart from prefering Billie to Britney).
Christina's jealousy of Britney is ridiculous, pathetic and very school girlish. From someone who constantly talked about how bad they were bullied, its rather gross for her to be taking all these uncalled for shots at Britney, especially about things as personal as her marriage and her pregnancy when Britney never retaliates.
She makes good records and has a good voice, but she suffers from thinking she is much more intelligent then she is, and most of her "girl power" manifesto's don't make any logical sense.
I'll take Britney any day.