A rant that started out about Paris Hilton

[Ronald Parisi]

I guess the first paragraph you said make sense. But it's no longer funny anymore, it's annoying.

[Jen]

greg said:

No really. She's pretty, she's rich and she's a superstar what more could you want? Really.

Seriously? Well firstly she really isn't that pretty. Bleached hair, over tanned, too big nose, tacky extentions and coloured contact lenses. Look at some pictures before her "celebrity makeover". It ain't so pretty- literally. What more could we want? A personality for starters. A brain would be nice. The ability to engage in a normal conversation or interview would also be great.
Also she isn't a superstar. Beyonce is a superstar. Mariah Carey is a superstar. Tom Cruise is a superstar. She is a rich socialite who got famous because she blew her boyfriend on camera and acted like a twat with poor(er) people and again, was filmed doing it. Only now has her first film come out, her music isn't out yet so how is she a superstar? A hybrid of socialite, porn star and reality tv star doesn't equal a superstar. It equals a huge fucking nuisance.

[Ronald Parisi]

jennyscott said:

greg said:

No really. She's pretty, she's rich and she's a superstar what more could you want? Really.

Seriously? Well firstly she really isn't that pretty. Bleached hair, over tanned, too big nose, tacky extentions and coloured contact lenses. Look at some pictures before her "celebrity makeover". It ain't so pretty- literally. What more could we want? A personality for starters. A brain would be nice. The ability to engage in a normal conversation or interview would also be great.
Also she isn't a superstar. Beyonce is a superstar. Mariah Carey is a superstar. Tom Cruise is a superstar. She is a rich socialite who got famous because she blew her boyfriend on camera and acted like a twat with poor(er) people and again, was filmed doing it. Only now has her first film come out, her music isn't out yet so how is she a superstar? A hybrid of socialite, porn star and reality tv star doesn't equal a superstar. It equals a huge fucking nuisance.

OH MY GOD, You just said everything I've wanted to say about her, but didn't say because I didn't want to get more people hating me. Thanks!

But also, don't forget the whole fact that, if you are rich enough you can do anything in the US. But that doesn't make you an "American Princess" nor does it make you a good actress or singer.

Paris Hilton is a social retard. She has no people skills, whatsoever, and everyone knows this. That's why she says "that's hot" so much. I think other American superstars can think of better things to say in interviews besides a two word, two syllabol phrase that really never applies to anything.

Example:

A Conversation With Paris* by Me!

ABC- Hello Paris and welcome to ABC nightly News.
PARIS- (monotoned) Hello Miss. Walters
ABC- It's Mrs.
PARIS-(monotoned) (Long Pause) Oh, that's hot.
ABC- So, Paris, tell us about your new movie, HOUSE OF WAX
PARIS- (monotoned) Well it's a cover of a really hot movie. But I can't seem to remember the originals name. But It's hot.
ABC- The original was called the same thing.
PARIS- (monotoned) What?
ABC- House of Wax is the name of the original.
PARIS- (monotoned) I don't get it.
ABC- (after a deep, long, sigh) Nevermind.
PARIS- (monotoned) No, really. you can say it.
ABC- (Speaking angered) The original movie was called "House Of Wax" too.
PARIS-(monotoned) Oh. That's hot.
ABC- Moving on. Now there is a lot of controversy over your new Carl's Jr television ad. Would you like to talk about it with us?
PARIS-(monotoned) Yeah. I did this commercial for this food company called "Carl's JR". It a fast food place, like that one place. DO you know what it's called?
ABC- Burger King?
PARIS-(monotoned) No, the one with the golden arches.
ABC- McDonald's.
PARIS-(monotoned) Yeah them. It's like that. But better. They've got this burger called a $6 burger. It's hot.
ABC- I see. Now this ad is a bit spicy isn't it?
PARIS-(monotoned) Yeah it's hot.
ABC- (getting pissed) Naw really.
PARIS-(monotoned) Seriously.

(long pause of silence. Paris just sits there, looking at her feet, and ABC looks frustraighted starring at her in disgust)


ABC- Is there anything else you would like to say?
PARIS-(monotoned) Yes, I love your Dress. Is it guchi?
ABC- Do you even know what Guchi Is, Paris?
PARIS-(monotoned) Yeah! It's a store, like Wal*mart! Only bigger. I learned that from my show. It's so hot.
ABC- Do you have anything else to say. I need to go get trashed.
PARIS- Did I tell you? I have a dog. She's Hot.
ABC- Shit, I really need to get trashed. YOu have any coke.
PARIS-(monotoned) Only the hottest.

(PARIS and ABC sniff up together in perfect harmony)

THE END.

Bows.


Okay that was too much fun.


*fictional

[sophiefrombloke]

jennyscott said:

Seriously? Well firstly she really isn't that pretty. Bleached hair, over tanned, too big nose, tacky extentions and coloured contact lenses. Look at some pictures before her "celebrity makeover". It ain't so pretty- literally.

Go work for Heat magazine. Paris is fitter than at least 95% of the rest of the world. Maybe she's not amazingly hot compared to her cohorts, but she's definitely buffer than the majority of the world. So what if she's had plastic surgery? That's her decision. Just because she used to be not-so-attractive doesn't mean she can't be now. It's like saying that Bruce Willis isn't bald because he used to have hair.

jennyscott said:

What more could we want? A personality for starters. A brain would be nice. The ability to engage in a normal conversation or interview would also be great.

How do you know Paris can't do any of this? She takes advantage of the fact that she can do next-to-nothing in an interview and still end up owning it.

jennyscott said:

Also she isn't a superstar. Beyonce is a superstar. Mariah Carey is a superstar. Tom Cruise is a superstar. She is a rich socialite who got famous because she blew her boyfriend on camera and acted like a twat with poor(er) people and again, was filmed doing it. Only now has her first film come out, her music isn't out yet so how is she a superstar? A hybrid of socialite, porn star and reality tv star doesn't equal a superstar. It equals a huge fucking nuisance.

superstar: n : someone who is dazzlingly skilled in any field.

There's no denying that whatever Paris does, she does it the best.

thisemptybrain said:

Paris Hilton is a social retard. She has no people skills, whatsoever, and everyone knows this. That's why she says "that's hot" so much

You don't know Paris. Duh.

thisemptybrain said:

*fictional

I will respect any opinion you have as long as you can back it up with some fact or knowledge as a basis for your argument. However, making things up to suit yourself is the exact opposite of that. Cunt.

[Ronald Parisi]

Um, you just called me a cunt?
OKAY SOMEONE TAKING INTO THIS TO MUCH.

If you were paying any attention the "*fiction" was stating the interview was fictional. But it was based on Paris' TRL interview.

And don't call me a cunt again.

[Ronald Parisi]

Also, please note the difference from liking someone and being obsessed, if you're going to get this pissed off over a light subject, you need a pychologist badly. People diss everyone's favorite celebs. The normal ones don't get so caught up in it they call people cunts.

[sophiefrombloke]

thisemptybrain said:

Also, please note the difference from liking someone and being obsessed, if you're going to get this pissed off over a light subject, you need a pychologist badly. People diss everyone's favorite celebs. The normal ones don't get so caught up in it they call people cunts.

I didn't call Jen a cunt, even though she shares your views on Paris, because Jen can actually make a decent argument, whereas you rely on your made up stories to back up your opinions. I will be very pleased if you can get your views across, but if they're based on nonsense, then they're not valid.

[Ronald Parisi]

And the truth is so much different?

I would ask for forgivness over my mini-play, but there's nothing wrong. Why not make something humorus out of the truth? People do it all the time. It's called TV

[sophiefrombloke]

thisemptybrain said:

And the truth is so much different?

I would ask for forgivness over my mini-play, but there's nothing wrong. Why not make something humorus out of the truth? People do it all the time. It's called TV

You're using fiction to back up your argument. Don't you understand that that's wrong?

I see a cartoon of Saddam Hussein making love to Satan. Should I immediately assume that this is true?

[Ronald Parisi]

I wasn't backing up the arguement by the play. I was just doing it to have fun. Damn, people like you are the problem with society and pop music alike these days. You're so serious, lighten up a bit! Laugh at yourself! Have fun! Why does everyone have to act like the world is against them?

[Jen]

sophiefrombloke said:

Paris is fitter than at least 95% of the rest of the world.

Maybe she's not amazingly hot compared to her cohorts, but she's definitely buffer than the majority of the world.

So by "the world" you mean "normal people" as you don't seem to be including them in your percentages. And I wasn't aware you've met the majority of the world to back up such statements.

So what if she's had plastic surgery?

Well, exactly. I don't believe I ever mentioned it. Although she would deny it, and you'd figure if she was going to have work done she'd sort out her nose.

That's her decision. Just because she used to be not-so-attractive doesn't mean she can't be now.

True, but I believe I was also exhibiting reasons I don't see her as attractive even now.

How do you know Paris can't do any of this?

How about watching her being interviewed, or on documentaries? She's not that good an actress.

She takes advantage of the fact that she can do next-to-nothing in an interview and still end up owning it.

In that case, she's doing one hell of a job. But I doubt she's even close to being that self aware. And in a one on one interview of course she's going to own it! They're interviewing her about her- who else is going to own it, the microphone?

superstar: n : someone who is dazzlingly skilled in any field.

There's no denying that whatever Paris does, she does it the best.

Really? I've seen better reality tv stars. I've seen better models. I've heard a lot better singers and I dammed sure I've seen better actresses then her. Your seriously saying that her performance as herself in 'The O.C" or in "House of wax" is better then all the Oscar winners, for instance, of the past? Or that her vocals on "Screwed" are miles better then your Beyonces, Aretha Franklins or Christina Aguileras?

[sophiefrombloke]

jennyscott said:

So by "the world" you mean "normal people" as you don't seem to be including them in your percentages. And I wasn't aware you've met the majority of the world to back up such statements.

What I meant through my exaggeration is that...When you watch American TV and film, you become cultivated to think that all people are good-looking. I got really upset one time after going out after watching lots of The OC, Nip/Tuck, ER, The L Word, Sex and The City, Scrubs, America's Next Top Model (obviously), Desperate Housewives and Buffy; because I realised people aren't actually that beautiful. Paris didn't look ugly compared to any of those people. [lesleh]At the end of the day, right[/lesleh], people will have their own opinions on how Paris looks. I don't think she's that uneasy on the eye, personally.

jennyscott said:

Well, exactly. I don't believe I ever mentioned it. Although she would deny it, and you'd figure if she was going to have work done she'd sort out her nose.

She's never been asked, to my knowledge. It's interesting that it's so obvious that she's had plastic surgery, but her whole career isn't plagued by plastic surgery rumours, like many other celebrities out there.

jennyscott said:

In that case, she's doing one hell of a job. But I doubt she's even close to being that self aware. And in a one on one interview of course she's going to own it! They're interviewing her about her- who else is going to own it, the microphone?

Well, if she was Tom Cruise, insanity would own the interview.

jennyscott said:

Really? I've seen better reality tv stars. I've seen better models. I've heard a lot better singers and I dammed sure I've seen better actresses then her. Your seriously saying that her performance as herself in 'The O.C" or in "House of wax" is better then all the Oscar winners, for instance, of the past? Or that her vocals on "Screwed" are miles better then your Beyonces, Aretha Franklins or Christina Aguileras?

Psshh. Paris isn't a singer, she's not an actress. She's an heiress and socialite, yah?

[Ronald Parisi]

"Psshh. Paris isn't a singer she's not an actress. She's an heiress and socialite, yah?"

Good point. I just kinda wish she would stay there and not try the other two. Let her have her TV show, I can deal with that. I just feel like it's not cool that she's wasting some other actual singer and actress' talents.

[sophiefrombloke]

thisemptybrain said:

Good point. I just kinda wish she would stay there and not try the other two. Let her have her TV show, I can deal with that. I just feel like it's not cool that she's wasting some other actual singer and actress' talents.

So she's not that bad. Screwed, as a song, despite Paris' vocals being a bit crap, is actually an alright song. I haven't really seen much of Paris' acting, probably because it's nonexistent. That's what's so fascinating about her.

[Ronald Parisi]

Sophia, you're right. I agree with you for the most part.

I did find out something interesting though:

Paris, as well as many other multi-millionaires out there, donate money but then come april 15th put it under tax deductable, so they are refunded over 3/4 of the money they donated every year. Which to me, is interesting. I guess it's not a bad thing, but it's kinda have me questioning why are you donating in the first place? Oh well. Back to the begining though, I still wish screwed was sung by someone else. I can't think of an artist who could do it worse than Paris.

[drbeat]

Ugh..I have to agree with Sharon Osbourne on this, she is a scrawny piece of grizzle, Paris is a ho, she is famous because she had sex on tape, mind you The Osbourne children are no better, at least Paris manages to spend some of her money on looking good while Kelly looks absolutely shit.

[Ronald Parisi]

Sharon Osbourne said that?

Kelly Osbourne at least looks (when not stoned/drunk/or suffering from schitzophrenic interviews) like average. I thought Kelly looked very nice in the One Word video.

[Storm]

Right. let's wrap this up, because it's becoming quite tedious.

At the end of the day, Paris Hilton IS a superstar - because everybody knows her, and she is completely successful in her field intenationally, regardless of what that field is.

Nobody would hvae done that well if they weren't exceptionally shrewd. Yes, she was already rich, but the world is full of extremely rich women, not all of them famous. Whether the videotape was part of that is by the by - she used it to her advantage to fuel her celebrity, in the same manner as Abi Titmuss has in this country. Whether you object to that is your own opinion, but those are the facts.

Can I just also say, that whilst it's natural to form opinions, and likes and dislikes of celebrities based on what we see of them on the tv, to say they have no brain or are nasty people etc etc when we don't know them, is not only extremely naive and stupid, but rather offensive.

This empty brain - you don't like her. We get it. Get over it.

Ooh, I like being all controversial.

[PushTheBuena]

NOOOOOOOOOOOO.

Not only is her dog perched on her freaking vagina, but her eye wonk is on full steam, her wig is falling off and she looks baked.

[sophiefrombloke]

yizzo. That photo of Paris is for charity, is it not?

[Ronald Parisi]

Oh my god. That poor dog. I think I vomited a little.

Anywho, I have a general question without pointing out that this is Paris Hilton: is it me, or does the top of her upper back, where it meets her shoulders and neck on this girll seem slightly hunched? I'm not talking about her actual shoulder bone, but right above that on her neck.

[sophiefrombloke]

thisemptybrain said:

Oh my god. That poor dog. I think I vomited a little.

Anywho, I have a general question without pointing out that this is Paris Hilton: is it me, or does the top of her upper back, where it meets her shoulders and neck on this girll seem slightly hunched? I'm not talking about her actual shoulder bone, but right above that on her neck.

Oh dear. Maybe she should get to an osteopath! Or, there's every possibility that her shoulder is higher than it'd normally be, so she can get her hands on the wheel and cover her nipple at the same time. Nitpick much?

[Ronald Parisi]

:-D Well, I deeply am concerned for her well-being. If she's got a hump on her back she should get it fixed. I mean, it's not like she can't afford it.

(Psst) I Don't know why I notice the things I do at times.

[ScissorSister]

The episode of South Park that features Paris Hilton is one of the best ever.

Her dog commits suicide, she tries to buy Butters and dress him up as a teddy bear, and she creates a frenzy in South Park because all the girls begin to go to her new shop "Stupid Spoiled Whore" . It also shows an ad for "Stupid Spoiled Whore Video Playset" and a mention of her new range of perfumes, "Skanque."

It's one of the best. Bu I have to say I agree with them. She's famous for no reason apart from being a rich party girl and it annoys me that she will be a multi-millionaire/billionaire when she inherits the Hilton fortune.

[Ronald Parisi]

I love that episode! South Park did it so well!

[kristofer]

Hold on. You excluded the Black Eyed Peas from your hack list?

[faithless]

The South Park parody of Paris is class. I love how she coughs up what looks like gak about 10 times. I also love how they got her to shove a pineapple up her box. And of course the climatic showdown where she gets trapped inside Mr Slave's hot ass. (!)

My question is, how in God's name do Trey/Matt get away with it? I mean, South Park has ripped the shit out of some people in the past but never quite to the extreme that Paris got. I would've thought she would try and sue or block the episode or something...

[dborhem]

faithless said:

South Park has ripped the shit out of some people in the past but never quite to the extreme that Paris got. I would've thought she would try and sue or block the episode or something...

Oh please,she is a selfish egotistical candycain pink nightmare,and totally gets off on this.
At every photo-oppertunity she does the same squirmy headtilted pose and now she even dares to dictate the Academy Awards for the fact that she had to 'go barefoot through the woods for her movie House of Wax'.
Honey,you ARE a piece of wax,no brains no substance,just pure BLOB.
On MTV her clones are already taking over,one was a very big fan of hers,and she demanded that a guy brought his creditcard,or else the date was off.
SHEESH!

[PushTheBuena]

It's one of the best. Bu I have to say I agree with them. She's famous for no reason apart from being a rich party girl and it annoys me that she will be a multi-millionaire/billionaire when she inherits the Hilton fortune.

Apparently the Hiltons aren't all that rich. Obviously compared to the average person they're loaded but the combined factor of over extravagance and a lot of people with a claim to the family inheritance means that, particularly when compared to the circles they run in, they're actually at the bottom of the pile. I read something ages ago about how Paris and Nicky's holiday home in some rich person resort is a shack compared to everyone elses, and that Paris was encouraged to famewhore herself out from an early age by her mother who is ruthlessly upwardly mobile and thinks that Paris getting cash and fame from her exploits will push the Hiltons into the top tier of the American so called meritocracy. Which explains why she is so bizarrely proud of what her daughter has done to get where she is. She's also supposedly ecstatic about Paris marrying into the Latsises where as Boy!Paris's family are really not pleased...



...I can't really blame them.

Nicole > Paris anyday.

[Ronald Parisi]

Oh... my...

I just almost lost my lunch. I'm pretty speechless now.

That is the worst thing... ever