Billie Is Writing Her Memoirs!

[Kirkland]

Could this be the best book ever? We've all heard the rumours about Billie's wild days in pop music, could she finally be ready to give us the dirtiest dirt ever or will this be noneventful rubbish?

This is a girl who married a millionaire twice her age.

She scored hits with an ease that Rachel Stevens would kill to have.

She broke records (not actually her own).

She is Rose Tyler.

Again, could this be the best book ever?

[splitchick59]

Again, could this be the best book ever?

Possibly. Enough so that I would import it.

[Fax Mactor]

Why you gotta read my memoirs out so loud.

Because we want to.
Because we want to.

[Steveweiser]

I wonder how long the chapter on her being booed at the Poll Winners Party will be?

[Kirkland]

Here is a little passage from the book (with apologies):

I was onstage doing my thing when some little bitch started screaming my name and I was like 'bitchin' because I know I'm better than any sissy little bitchfucker because I'm a singer, you see, well anyway I was getting to the end of Girlfriend, a song I don't even give a shit about and this stupid girl started screaming my name again and I realised it wasn't a girl but that dork from 5ive. What's his name? You know, that little tit who looks like The Joker.

The rumours of Billie's debauched behaviour in her pop years were legendary. I wonder if the whole Charlie The Sun Sniffer Dog incident will be in it. That would be worth the price of the book alone.

[hypnotic]

I was onstage doing my thing when some little bitch started screaming my name and I was like 'bitchin' because I know I'm better than any sissy little bitchfucker because I'm a singer, you see, well anyway I was getting to the end of Girlfriend, a song I don't even give a shit about and this stupid girl started screaming my name again and I realised it wasn't a girl but that dork from 5ive. What's his name? You know, that little tit who looks like The Joker.

How about no, Just Stop.

I dont understand why she left music so early. She was deff. successfull. Hmm..

[marcus]

I wonder if it'll include the chaz baps story that did the rounds a few years back.

[Kirkland]

I pray it's true. What about the rumours of how she treated Rich? I pray they are true as well.

[jxtc]

i wonder if she will mention when her boob popped out at g-a-y when she performed day and night there

oh my god i saw rose tylers boob!

[Maureen]

She was the queen of 'kidney infections'. It should be a good read if you're a fan, although I didn't have much time for her while she was first around.

She was one of the last pop stars to attain success despite having little actual talent: OK dancer; dubious singing skills etc. Her saving grace was that she was in the right place at the right time and the world really was all about pop, and she was given some good little tracks.

[xolondon]

Can you imagine this? Best book in the same way Paula Yates (RIP) wrote a great memoir?

"Today I went down to the chippie in my flip flops with Chris. He complained about me roots. Then back home to watch Corrie before going to the pub with Chris. He complained about me ass."

[sarahofthedead]

I want to read this book. Soon.

[beNcooKe]

she'll have a hell of a job remembering much of her memoirs surely?

[butterflyboy]

Cant Fucking Wait

[Fax Mactor]

I feel i must dig out my old Billie CDs now that i have neglected for so many years.

Honey to the B, thats you for me.

Amazing.

[Kirkland]

I remember when I first heard that song, because Billie's voice was strange I could swear I heard her sing: "Honey to the B....come on and fuck me".

Everyone was playing that sequence in the common room, nobody could believe it. I thought it was really punk until I realised we all just had shit hearing.

[sifr]

I am so fucking vindicated on Billie. For some reason her name kept popping up during my media seminars at Uni back in 99, and I was much mocked when I let slip I had "Honey To The B". I always defended her to the best of my abilities, but admittedly my verbal sparring wasn't up to its current standard back then.

Cut to 2005 and BBC1, and now who's fucking laughing? Told them she was good.

Incidentally, I still maintain much affection (and iPod space) towards Honey To The B, especially "I Dream" and "Love Groove".

[Molly]

kirkland said:

I remember when I first heard that song, because Billie's voice was strange I could swear I heard her sing: "Honey to the B....come on and fuck me".

Well, she does say 'Come on and buzz me up to Heaven, baby.' So you know. You weren't far off, in the implication.

This book will be awesome.
Chapter 1: Smash Hits Ad
Chapter 2: First Album
Chapter 3: Second album, plus the chart-death of Walk Of Life
Chapters 4-15: Dossing around the world getting drunk and eating chips with my old ginger husband
Chapter 16: I'm an actress now!

[Fax Mactor]

What else has she appeared in apart from Canterbury Tales?

[theemancipatedone]

I hope she does a signing tour. I'd stalk her like she's never been stalked before.

[Kirkland]

faxmactor said:

What else has she appeared in apart from Canterbury Tales?

Are you taking the piss?

Doctor Who! It's the best tv series, nay, thing in the world.

[Fax Mactor]

Yes, i am taking the piss.

I love Dr Who.. and Rose!

[vasilios]

And that's why she won't be doing one.

[Fax Mactor]

Didn't Rachel Stevens audition to be Rose?

The best woman won.

[Kirkland]

I love Billie.

[sinitta]

Rachel auditioned to be in the Doctor Who spin-off Torch Wood but didn't get that either bless her.

I hope Virgin release a cash in Billie Gold DVD with all her videos and various bits and bobs to pad it out. They won't be we can wish.

[beNcooKe]

I much preferred the stuff from her second album as it was less bubble gum pop. The production od Day and Night was lovely and I really liked that bit in the video where she ran up the wall. My partner in [fashion] crime used to try re enact that whenever he had consumed southern comfort.

[MaryCherry]

Billie was mean to Tina Cousins on the set of TOTP - I know this coz Tina told me.

Billie therefore is evil.

[beNcooKe]

heres that very video

www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bm_O6JnsmrY

[97williamsb]

I still think the dance routine in Day & Night is one of the best.
I would buy this book. It's rare I buy a book too.
Could be interesting reading, especially with the court case with the death threats etc.